Home love A conglomeration.

A conglomeration.

January 25, 2013
Here are my thoughts today:
-Eating like crap is fine if it’s literally raining ice outside. I feel like it’s a get-of-jail-free card in the game of life, guys. That half-pan of brownies is only gonna replenish the calories you burned being MISERABLY cold.
-But actually, it wasn’t even miserable. It was mostly just unbelievably great – because I choose to think a day like this will never happen again. It was fun crossing campus today, alternately penguin-walking and sliding like I was the figure-skater I’ve always dreamed of being. I’ve NEVER gotten to class so fast. Also, how fun was it to just take a second and watch the comedy FLY as people trekked across campus, trying to keep their cool? Mother Nature dealt us all a one-way ticket to Struggletown today.
-For some reason, the thought came to me today that I’m crossing my fingers my husband will love me enough to buy me a really sick old-school typewriter and also, take me to Amsterdam. And that he’ll know me well enough to do both of those things at some point in our little life.
-(Also, if he vaguely resembled Jude Law. I’mma find you. I’mma find you, Jude.)
-Being sore from exercise is both rewarding and humiliating. No, I don’t always walk like a newborn filly. Yes, I bet you regret waiting and holding that door open for me since it’s taking me 20 years to actually get there. Sorry, stranger. I’ll just… Sorry.
-Things you never want to hear at a physical:
1) “And now they also require a breast exam….I. Sorry. I wish. Well. I guess we. Oh.” (It wasn’t weird until you made it weird. I’ve been getting the lump in lefty checked every 3-6 months for two years now. This isn’t my first rodeo. But now I’m laughing uncomfortably because you’re being so weird, and the suppressed laughing is only making things weirder for everyone. Good times.)
2) “You must’ve really enjoyed the food in China, looks like!” …. Gonna have to pretend like I didn’t hear that.
3) “Really solid abs. Wow, that’s crazy. You’re ripped! You should do like those exercise videos!”
You should probs just not talk about it while you’re probing for hernias with your cold hands, friend. I’m just saying. Thanks, though. :/
-Ever since I saw this video, I’ve been craving a mad dance party in onesies. Also, a kiss or two with Ryan Gosling. Guys, I don’t know what it is lately. We’re recently in love.
Who’s in for the dance party? More importantly, who owns a onesie? Possibilities are actually endless.

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4 comments

Kira Johnson January 25, 2013 at 6:13 am

I'm sorry I comment on almost every post… But I had to tell you that I am sitting here laughing out loud from reading this. You are so clever, Shelby. The "Mother Nature dealt us all a one-way ticket to Struggletown today," had me laughing so hard! And the whole physical had me guffawing. Also, I own onesies. And I like dance parties.

Reply
Shelby January 25, 2013 at 6:14 am

KIRA.

Never STOP commenting. It always makes my day. Every last time.

I love your laugh. Wish I could be there to hear it. Creepy? Good. LET'S DANCE PARTY TOMORROW. I'll call you. Cutie.

Reply
kylie January 27, 2013 at 10:53 pm

hahaha. love ryan gosling. so hot.

Reply
Shelby January 27, 2013 at 10:54 pm

Hahaha. I literally cannot handle myself about it. So glad I'm not alone.

Reply

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